I live in a very mall town of west Bengal with very conservative type family but my world is far more different from them all…m 18..and i have a dream like every students to get admission in a nit college but due to some reasons i failed in maths in 12th…for that i didn’t get admission in any govt college and my parents are not capable of getting me to an pvt college so they asked me to take a drop…i was not prepared for this…when i see every 1 in good colleges i feel ashamed of myself and feel like dying because 1 yr is not a short time…still 4 months r remaining and i haven’t even started my preparations for next year…i daily make myself determined to start preparing and i do as just for 2 or e days after that again i feel the fear of failing again…what will happen if i didn’t get this time too?…what will happen if my rank is not good enough? This fear of failing is killing me from inside….
i don’t know what to do…my parents r getting fed of me…m the only support for them in future if i didn’t get a good college how will i survive…i didn’t know how to start my preparation for exam..and don’t know how much effort i have to put to get a good govt college…..this fear of failing i keeping me back…i tried a lot to get rid of this…but the saying r just for virtual world…in real world u cant get rid of what u have experienced once…everybody says that study hard and u will get a govt college ..and m trying to…but every night i remember my failure in 12th i got that fear again and start worrying about the results….this thing is killing me…i didn’t have a luxurious dream..just a normal life with normal needs….once i had so many friends but after this all my friends r in college but me still stuck here…they started ignoring me now i feel like all alone…i didn’t have a girl friend because i didn’t believe in love…..so there is no one to say or share my feelings to that why m taking this means to share it to all of u! Thanks for the admin of this page…and thank you all! That’s it…
-An Indian Confession