Confession of Girl who got cheated in her Relationship

I am sharing this because I want to feel lighter inside. I would appreciate any kind of suggestions.

I am a 27-year-old female. I was in a relationship with a guy for 3.5 years, and we broke up in 2019. I was very sad after it and used to miss him a lot. Suddenly, after 9 months, he texted me, and we started talking again. My heart was like, “OMG, he is still in love with me.” He was a good guy, polite, caring, always paying the whole bill at restaurants, putting in small efforts. I was like, “Yes!!! I got the guy of my life.” BUT… the twist comes here. After 2 years of talking with him, he opened up to me and admitted that he had been talking to other girls too and had sex with 2 of them. I was so submerged in my feelings for him that I never kissed a boy except him.

The moment he shared that with me, I was like, cool, I didn’t cry. But when I went to sleep at night, it really hit me hard in my heart. During these 2 years, I also got physical with him, that too with no intention of making him my timepass. After all of this, I even tried to remain just friends with him for quite a few days. But it all went in vain.

After a lot of overthinking on this matter, I decoded that I was in a situationship with him for 2 years, in terms of today’s generation. I am sad at this point, how I became an emotional fool these many years, who used only her heart and not her brain. I overlooked his hints of being casual. Now, I really want to get out of this drama in my life. My parents are also thinking of my marriage within 2 years. I don’t want to move into any serious relationship until I get out of that drama. I’m really stuck between my heart and my brain.