We got together when we were doing our UG. In the first two years, I was trying to get in touch with her and become her friend because we didn’t know each other. After around two years, we started talking daily. I’m into texting, but not much improvement happened, so I thought I would confess my feelings to her when we entered our college days. Surprisingly, at one point, we got together, which was towards the end of our UG time, and we were in a long-distance relationship. We never got to stay together for much time.
It was a long-distance relationship for us, but after some time, when she got a job, she used to say she couldn’t handle the relationship and work together. It was giving her too much pressure. I’m not saying I wasn’t making any issues or anything. I used to sometimes create issues, like asking why she didn’t text or call. I might forget some things she told me, and I usually forget the things she tells me, like everything. At times, I used to forget, and that would lead to another set of problems. Still, when the fights were resolved, we used to talk in a pretty good way. When she told me something the first time, it wouldn’t hurt me much, but after two days, when I asked her why she said what she did, it would hurt me. She would say, “This is not the right time to ask. If you had something to say, you should have said it at that time.”
Even after everything got over, at one point, she asked to break up around 4 to 5 times, and I was trying to hold it together. At one point, everything shattered, and I was the one mostly affected by this. Within the first month, I felt like she had moved on pretty well. She was improving, and I was just sitting here, not knowing what to do. I lost a few friends in the process. At times, I feel like I should call her and try to make things work. I did that a few times, but it’s not working. It’s been almost 5 to 6 months since we broke up, and I still feel like there is no hope of getting back together. I used to listen to all the things she said.
Sometimes I would say, “That’s not possible,” or “I’m not interested in that way,” but still, I actually don’t know where I went wrong. One of the main reasons for the breakup was that she wanted a break. She used to sit and ask for a break, and I was least interested in giving that because I do not believe in the concept of a break in a relationship. When things got hard, she left. I tried for so long, and all my efforts seemed to be in vain. Even after the breakup, when we talked, she used to say, “I am putting in an effort to at least keep this friendship alive.” Whenever I asked, “What about my effort? All the effort I put in?” her reply would be, “Did I ask you to put in effort?”
We both know that if we get one more chance, things would never be the same again, and none of these fights or problems would ever rise again because we learn from our mistakes. But I don’t know why she’s not giving us one more chance. I’m the kind of person who, at one point, will lose interest in someone, whether it’s a friend or anyone. Once I lose that interest, I won’t be going back to that person ever again. That’s what scares me the most.