Hi everyone, I am 23 years male recently got back with my ex [23F] after 3 years, but I’m having second thoughts about the decision. We were in a long-distance relationship for 3 years and only met twice a year due to COVID. She left me at the end of 2021, only to come back after two years in 2023. By then, I had almost moved on, but deep down, I still wanted her because she was my first love. Those two years apart changed me significantly I developed a new mindset and realized I didn’t want to settle for less.
During those 2 years, I hadn’t been with anyone because it was hard for me to move on, while she had been dating on and off. Fast forward to 2023: I moved abroad for my studies, and out of nowhere, she texted me asking for advice on the visa process, as she was planning to move abroad next year. We started talking for hours, and then she confessed that all she had during those 2 years were flings, apart from one 3 months relationship.
To be honest, I don’t trust her at all. She broke up with me and started dating within a month. Also, I had once logged into her email on my laptop and found messages from a bunch of guys, some even shirtless. During those 2 years, she had no direction in life she was clueless, jobless, and spent her time clubbing. Suddenly, she realized she needed to fix her life, and that’s when she texted me. Now she seems a bit more mature and serious, and the thought of us being together once she moves abroad (we’ve never lived together, it was always long-distance) makes me overlook the photos I found.
However, she’s now saying that her parents aren’t allowing her to move abroad for studies, and she’s insisting on continuing the long-distance relationship. She wants to continue long distance because I push her to have a plan and to study, which has helped her land a job. For the past 6 months, she’s been at home under the pretext of preparing for higher education, but her parents didn’t allow her to go. Deep down, I feel like she’s just using me.
I’m pretty sure that once she moves out of her house and into a big city, she’ll go back to clubbing and hanging out with guys, and I won’t have any way of knowing what’s going on. She’s the first girl I’ve truly loved, and she knows I can’t say no to her I would never break up from my side. I’m unsure of what to do.