So, I met this guy 5 months ago on social media. He is the sweetest guy ever, and everything I’ve ever read or heard about finding the right guy describes him. He’s the greenest flag ever, but I am not able to feel any physical attraction towards him. We immediately clicked because we had similar views on life, and everything seemed perfect like something straight out of a movie because he treats me like a goddess. I need to mention that we met on social media, so it was mostly phone calls and chats.
But he made sure to show his love through everything possible in a long-distance relationship. Then one day, he surprised me by visiting, and we met. Unknowingly, it didn’t feel the way it should have. I realized it was because I didn’t find his physical appearance masculine enough for me (I feel terrible writing this). I know that for a romantic relationship to work, there has to be some physical attraction, but I didn’t feel it at all. Instead, I started feeling some repulsion toward him.
I should mention that in the span of our relationship, we never had any intimate texting or conversations. We had so much to talk about in other areas of life that we never really thought about discussing those things. But somewhere, I also feel that I was the one avoiding talking about it, not him. Before meeting him, I had just come out of a relationship where the physical connection was very strong, but the guy cheated on me. After a few failed relationships, I was ready to settle for an arranged marriage.
Then he came along, and I thought I had found the right person. But unfortunately, now we have met twice once for a short meeting and the second time for a 3 days trip and I didn’t let him touch me. We finally discussed what was happening, and with some courage, I explained it to him. It broke his heart, and he has started going to the gym, but I don’t know if I’ll ever get over this or if I’ll ever feel intimacy between us. Also, please let me know: am I a bad person for not feeling physically attracted to my partner because of the way his body looks? I respect him so much, and I like him more than anyone.
I wanted this to work out between us, but this issue in my head won’t let me get close to him, and I feel stuck. Please help me what should I do?