Confession of Male Bestie in Female Group

Who said only romantic relationship breakups hurt? Friendship breakups can hurt even more. I used to be close friend with a group of girls. We always had fun talking about our shared hobbies, especially anime. We maintained a strong bond for about a year and a half.

As the new year approached last year, I started noticing them becoming distant. I’m the type of person who always checks in on others, so I reached out to them frequently. However, I sensed a change in their behavior towards me, which, as someone who used to have anxious attachment issues, triggered significant anxiety.

I admit that I became more clingy (according to them), but everything changed when I found out they had formed a group without me. That discovery disappointed me deeply, so I decided to talk to them one by one. But guess what? They were all against me, which broke my heart. I had mentioned several times that I was considering leaving the group, but they insisted that I “had” to accept the changes and move on.

I understand that moving on is necessary, but couldn’t they have at least told me why instead of just pushing me to move on? I felt invalidated and “forced.” It’s not that I didn’t want to move on, but I needed us to talk about it first. Then, one day, I left the group on a whim a month before my birthday because I was too upset. I left for a day, expecting that they would reach out, so I tried to apologize, but they just kept blaming me, saying I got what I deserved. I was shocked. They all claimed it was my fault, and I did my best to acknowledge my mistakes without making excuses. I tried to give them “the space they needed,” but they stonewalled me for a whole month. One of them even went so far as to block me. I was so sad and devastated that I ended up deleting my account right before my birthday because I wanted to celebrate it happily.

They had promised to celebrate my birthday with me, and one of them even promised me a gift, but none of that happened.

Since I still cared about them, I tried one last time to reach out through a close friend to apologize and offer to talk. But they still refused, saying they were still hurt. That’s when I knew I had to walk the difficult path to healing on my own.

It took almost a year for me to fully move on and not feel pain whenever I heard their names. Sometimes I blamed them, but I realized I was at fault too. Perhaps I overthought things and was too aggressive, but I’m proud that I admitted my mistakes.

I’m sharing this story for those who feel lost. If you don’t get back together with your friends, it might be the universe’s way of telling you that you’re stepping into a new chapter. You are just as valuable whether you’re with them or standing on your own. Believe me, when you lose something, you gain something even better.

Disclaimer: I don’t want anyone to blame me or my friends. I believe both sides made mistakes, and this story is just my perspective. No judgment-just take this as a lesson learned. Bless everyone!

And in case you’re wondering, I haven’t reconnected with them, even though I left my other social media contacts. They haven’t reached out to me to this day, but it’s okay. I’ve slowly reconnected with old friends and built stronger relationships with them.