Hello, I wanted to share something. I married against my parents’ wishes. It’s been three years since I got married. Our relationship is perfect except for one thing, intimacy. I hate the word “SEX”. It makes my blood boil, and I feel bad for my partner.
A year later, someone suggested I consult a psychiatrist, so we both went. Tests were conducted, and everything came back normal. The doctor said my aversion to intimacy might be due to past traumatic experiences and diagnosed me with severe depression.
My husband has tried talking about it many times, but it just triggers me. I burst out in anger as if I might hurt him or myself. I don’t know what this is. I don’t want to waste my partner’s life.
He is such a sweet person and truly deserves better. But he refuses to leave me. And even if I left him, I have nowhere to go. I’m just a 12th-grade pass-out. I’m stuck badly, and I don’t know what to do. I often feel suicidal. I’m crying while writing this.
Please don’t think I never tried. I did my best to be Intimate with him, but I just couldn’t do it. It disgusts me. It is dirty. My life is fucked!
i think in your childhood you are tramatized about sex because you are molested if it is correct then you need to talk this with your husband and clear the pain in your heart will be down some if i am wrong i am very sorry i you are offended dont use curse words on me your sweet husband will need you not your intimacy he was one of the best person i see in this present generation if your problem is only intimacy i will tell you intimacy is only think in human life and in marriage,successful marriages need normal romance not sexul intimacy romance is different and sex is different there are so many things in life just change the perspective,if it is your health problem it cant be reversed but it is your mental problem which is very easy to change just you need to take control of your brain it is easier said than done but it is not impossible to do the problem is in your brain you need to takle it if you want to achive the successful physical intimicy your husband also help you if you want any help for healing your problem in bagavat gita krishna said make 1 step from my side i make 10 steps from your side, why i telling this was you need to take action(finding root cause of the problem ,searching solution and implementing the solution) instead of overthinking and crying.Most of the men need supporting wifes not physical intimacy most of the time i think you find the msg i need to convay so start take action as soon as possible i think it helps if you are really offended at any point i am really sorry my intention is not to hurt you.