During my college days, I fell in love with my senior. Our relationship was blissful, except for one major issue: his mother controlled every aspect of our lives. He constantly sided with her. After three years together, I found myself trapped at home, my parents refused to accept my love. We had discussed this with his mother long before, trying to figure out what to do if my parents rejected us. I sacrificed my career for him, choosing not to pursue a job after college and instead spent over a year convincing my parents to accept our relationship.
But there were no efforts from his side. He never approached my parents and simply followed his mother’s orders. After 1.5 years, he called my dad just once. My dad made it clear he wouldn’t accept us, and just like that, he left me to marry someone else and is now a father. Years have passed since that day, and I’ve wasted my career for him. My parents are now seeking alliances for me, but no suitable match has been found.
As I prepared for job exams, I met someone new and started to like him. However, haunted by my past, I didn’t pay him much attention. A year after our initial meeting, we started chatting on Facebook. He was financially unstable, struggling to pay off debts, and had a history of alcoholism. After we connected, he managed to reduce his drinking significantly, but he carried a heavy burden from his past.
Initially, everything seemed fine, but as time went on, his financial struggles worsened. A stranger learned about my relationship and informed my parents of his debts and past alcoholism, warning them that I was making a grave mistake. They beat me and forbade me from seeing him. Yet, I secretly maintained our relationship. He has been loyal, but due to his financial issues, he can’t spend much time with me. I lack the emotional support I need because he’s always preoccupied with money problems.
Despite this, I have experienced happiness with him on good days. We’ve been together for three years now. In the beginning, I believed we could manage our finances together; I insisted that money wasn’t essential for our happiness. However, as the years have gone by, it’s become painfully clear that financial stability is crucial for a happy life.
I’ve become his pillar of support, and he often tells me, “If you weren’t in my life, I would have given up.” Yet, many well-meaning friends advise me to leave him. They say I’ll ruin my future if I marry him, that I should choose someone my parents approve of. They promise that with the right partner, I’d have their support, while if I marry him and struggle, no one will help.
I feel strong enough to manage our finances and maintain balance in our lives, but I’m also terrified of what could go wrong. I’ve already endured so much, and if things take a turn for the worse now, I don’t know what I’d do.
Nowadays, I struggle to feel anything. communication between us has dwindled. I refuse to leave him for money, but the fear for my future looms large. I’m at a crossroads, unsure of what steps to take next.