My Boyfriend used me for all his needs

I met Mr. B because of my ex. Basically, my ex was cheating with a lady in Canada while he was there for his education. Mr. B happened to be the husband of that lady. That’s how we both ended up meeting. Mr. B reached out to me first, and that’s where I learned the truth. I was totally broken, as was Mr. B. However, I kept my pain aside and made sure I was there for him whenever he needed me, since I knew how it feels to be alone and not have anyone around in such a situation. He used to call me almost every day, and even if I was busy, I made time for him because I felt he was very vulnerable. After a few months, I realized that I was getting closer to him and decided to maintain some distance.

When I tried to do so, Mr. B confessed his feelings. I kept telling him several times that I didn’t want to get hurt again and end up in the same situation, as this time I would be completely broken and might never move on. I asked him to think carefully before making any commitments, but he promised me, “You won’t cry this time, and no matter what happens, I’ll stick by you.” Foolishly, I thought that since he had also been through the same phase, the chances of him ditching me were way less. And again, foolishly, I went ahead with it. Within a few months, I was completely in love with him, and I believe he felt the same. We were both residing outside of India, and he came all the way from another country just to visit me. He even introduced me to his sister. In such instances, I was convinced that a man who would do all this wouldn’t ditch me, and I trusted him blindly-completely blindly.

A few months passed, and he moved from one city to another within the same country. He completely changed-I don’t know if it was him all along, the city, or the people. He suddenly stopped picking up my calls and intentionally created situations where I would get upset, and then he would blame me for my behavior. One day in December, he called me and said he was moving to another house. We exchanged “I love you,” and that was it. After that, he just blocked and ghosted me. I kept calling him continuously, reaching out to his friends and sisters, but no one helped me-no one. Soon after, I saw him create a profile on a matrimonial site, claiming to be “never married.”

I used to write him emails because I was blocked EVERYWHERE. He later called me, saying, “Papa nahi maanenge” (his father wouldn’t agree), and that was the reason he left me. Since he was a Rajput, I asked him one question: “Before being physical, before using me as his emotional pillow or ATM machine, did you never realize that?” He didn’t like that statement and blocked me again. I kept emailing him, crying, and contacting people I knew to help me speak to him, but no one helped-not even his own sister (she was busy with her own affair, I would say). I kept seeing him adding girls from matrimonial sites and talking to them. I lost all my self-respect and kept emailing and trying to reach out, asking how he could leave me this way.

I was there for him whenever he wanted to cry about his ex-wife. Not even his parents supported him at that time-it was me standing with him, supporting him, feeding him, and being an ATM machine for his daily needs. I was devastated. I was unable to work, fell ill, and gained weight rapidly. I started praying, begging God to help me.

After several months, when he was rejected by most of the women on the matrimonial site, he came back to me and insisted on trying to talk to his family again. Foolishly, I happily gave him another chance. Within just one month, he didn’t even speak to his family, and he created his profile on the matrimonial site again. The same thing continued. He even got physical with girls he met at the club, but I ignored everything and just kept waiting, believing that he would come back. After several months, in December 2024, he came back again-again after being rejected by women and friends. He said he would try speaking to his family about me again.

Unfortunately, his mother passed away, and once again, I was his crying shoulder. Once again, he ditched me. He told me that I wasn’t a Rajput, so his father wouldn’t agree, without even speaking to his father. He did the SAME THING again-created a profile on the matrimonial site, and every time he wrote “never married,” even though he was a divorcee. This time it struck me that maybe it wasn’t his family-it was this man who was wrong. He kept searching for someone better. The worst thing he did was ask my parents to call his father so that things could get sorted and lead to marriage. When my parents tried calling, he went missing, and so did his dad.

I called him, his dad, his sisters-everyone-and no one picked up. He ghosted me again. He even blocked our numbers when it was him who had asked us to call. There’s a lot of tragedy I’ve gone through, losing all my self-respect. I tried to speak to his dad and him about how it was his son who wanted to marry me, how he had promised me marriage, and now I’m alone, crying, and broken, not knowing what to do. I know he’s playing games, but what should I do? Moving on isn’t easy after all this. I lost everything to this guy-literally everything. Will I ever get justice? I really want to pull this guy out of his den and tell his dad what his son has done. I need my self-respect back, but I don’t know what to do. It’s really difficult to handle this trauma I’ve been going through lately.

I don’t know what help can save me or get this man punished. I really want to pull him and his family out for playing with a girl’s life. I don’t expect the family to say yes, but at least have some respect and teach their son how to respect a girl. Instead, his family took his side while leaving someone else’s daughter to cry. The entire family has been absconding. If I had to move on, I would’ve done it long ago, but it looks like I’m stuck in this because I’ve been really wronged.

Question: What should I do? Because moving on isn’t an option.

Option 1: Try an alternate way to reach out-ideas welcome.

Option 2: There’s no other way.