My longtime best friend has started developing feelings for me. He has been my best friend since middle school-he’s the sweetest person I have ever known. We have been through thick and thin together, always having each other’s backs and being a shoulder to lean on in times of need.
During the middle years of our medical undergraduate studies, he dated my sister (we are three sisters, and I’m the middle one) and got into a relationship with her. I didn’t like the idea, but I wasn’t against it either, as I had a boyfriend at the time. After my father’s death, my best friend even took care of my family as if it were his own. He did everything like a son at my elder sister’s wedding. He was very loyal and giving, but things soon fell apart between him and my sister. She broke his trust and disrespected him deeply, leading to their breakup not long after.
Things turned very sour between him and my sister, but I never left his side. I understood his pain, as my ex also cheated on me after three years of being together. This all happened many years ago. Though my sister has moved on and has someone else in her life, she still resents him to this day-and resents me for continuing to be friends with him.
On the other hand, he became completely detached from women, friends, and even his own family. He moved to a different state for work but was always there for me, and I for him. Not a day has gone by without us talking.
Recently, he started developing feelings for me. I’m single, and so is he. I don’t want to lose him as a friend, but if I marry someone else, I won’t be able to be with him like before-I might even lose him forever. On the other hand, if I love him, I’m sure he would treat me like a queen, but how will everyone around me react? My sister might never speak to me again.
I’m getting older and need to think about marriage, but I don’t want to lose him. I might be the only person he truly has. At the same time, I don’t want to lose my sister either. She is selfish and would never accept it. I’m so fed up with this, yaar. Yeh uljhan mere liye bohot zyada hai, and I don’t know what to do. I’m feeling so messed up. Crazy yaar!
Question:
I’m so confused-am I already in love with him and just never realized it? Or am I unable to see him that way because he was with my sister? Either way, it’s a mess. I might lose him or my sister… What should I do?
Option 1: Should I accept my feelings for him and marry him?
Option 2: Should I put my emotions aside and leave him?
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