Hey I have been unlucky in love. Now, I don’t chase love anymore, but I want to tell you a story about my past relationship. I was in a relationship for four years. It was beautiful, damn good. I loved him a lot. After two years, things got worse. He started ghosting me, and whenever I asked him about it, he started abusing me. I always wanted to be with him in every situation. I planned to marry him, I planned my whole future with him.
But later, he refused to plan anything with me. He told me that his family wouldn’t allow him to marry a girl from another caste. I tried to explain to him. I was with him when he had nothing. We went on dates, and whenever I saw his face, I knew he had no money at that moment, so I used to pay the bills. I supported him in his career as well. Even after he refused to plan any future with me, I still stayed with him.
But maybe destiny never wanted us to be together. Suddenly, he ghosted me for 4 to 5 months. Yes, before this, we had fought a lot… but I thought this was just a long duration of no contact. I tried to call his friend, and finally, I found out where he was. I was shocked. He was happy and chill as if nothing had happened. We had another ugly fight. He said harsh things and abused me. He told me, “Leave me alone.
Why are you chasing me so much? Get out of here… I don’t want to give you any commitment. I can’t go against my parents.” I begged him to stay, but he just left me there. It took me a year to move on from him. Finally, I moved on. I realized my worth and started working on myself, my skills, and my studies. After this, I had a male friend from my academic circle. He supported me a lot during my healing phase.
Somewhere along the way, I got attached to him. One day, he expressed his feelings for me. I thought to myself, he gives me the care, pampering, and commitment I needed. I asked him why he wanted a future with me. He answered politely, “I have never seen a girl like you family oriented and loyal. You put in so much effort for everyone.” So, I told him to give me some time. After some time, he asked me for a coffee date.
I went with him, but midway, he took me to his office, where he is a sales manager. The office was closed that day. Suddenly, after saying some sweet and polite things, he tried to touch me and get physical with me. I pushed him away and shouted at him. He kept saying, “Let’s have some intimacy… I told you I want to marry you. If you’re confused, I can talk to my family, and we can get engaged in 1 to 2 years.”
But I wasn’t ready for any of that. I had already moved on from a toxic and ugly relationship. After his behavior, I realized that he didn’t genuinely like me he only wanted my body. He had loved a girl before meeting me, but she was from another religion, and their families didn’t approve. He told me that he had never even kissed that girl. Then I questioned myself if he couldn’t touch her, why did he behave like this with me?
Why did he want to get physical with me? It meant he didn’t truly want me. Maybe my emotions were just a toy for him. Even now, he still says, “If you want to think about marriage, I’m here.” And yesterday, March 27, 2025, I got rejected by a guy my family found for me. My family isn’t pressuring me, but someone told my mother about this guy, so she asked me to send some photos. I thought, Okay, fine, what’s wrong with this?
I sent my photos to him. He replied that he had an issue with short girls and rejected me for my height. That made me feel really low. I got confused again should I say yes to my male friend who took me to his office? But suddenly, I thought No, I shouldn’t because I don’t feel anything for him. And if I want a love marriage, there should be love. After that office incident, I was scared. He is not emotionally available for me.
I’m just waiting for the right person. I know nobody is perfect in this world. I got rejected for my height, but I have a question for everyone-does only physical beauty matter? I look beautiful, yes. But in this messed up era, I am looking for a guy who cherishes me for my actions, who supports my goals. If he is with me, we can grow together. Yes, I am manifesting that kind of guy.
But the question is should I settle for less or wait for someone? I have already faced a lot of trauma in love. Now, I think I deserve a better person because I am a better person. I believe that the personality you hold within yourself is exactly the kind of person you attract. I know nobody is completely loyal in this era. But the past doesn’t matter to me. If a guy is with me in my present, then I know he is mine.
Question:
Should I settle for less or wait for someone who is a true reflection of me?
Option 1: Try to trust the process of the universe.
Option 2: Believe in love again.
Option 3: Work on myself and achieve my goals.
Option 4: Stop chasing love altogether.