I’m M(22), and my girlfriend (20) and I have been in a long distance relationship for almost a year. At first, everything was amazing. She was so eager to talk to me, and I felt the same way like we were inseparable despite the distance. We both have exams coming up, and she’ll be going home at the end of the month, where we can only text. Knowing that our time to talk on the phone would be limited, I’ve been bending over backward to spend as much time with her as possible.
I’ve skipped hanging out with my friends and family because I *want* to prioritize her. But lately, it’s clear I’m not getting the same in return. She’s been going out all the time with her friends who are graduating, leaving me waiting for hours for a message, and when she finally gets back, she barely talks to me. She keeps telling me she needs to study and that I need to understand, but what about me? I also have exams, yet I still make time for her because I care!
Recently, she went out for dinner and then partied at a club with her friends. I was bored, so I posted some Instagram stories. A senior from college replied, and we ended up chatting until 4:30 AM. The next day, I shared screenshots of the conversation with my girlfriend, as I always do, but she didn’t say “I love you” before going to bed. Even when I asked, she didn’t say it. The next afternoon, she acted cold and cranky, claiming she was in a bad mood. Then she blurted out that my texting with the senior bothered her!
I was *shocked.* Here she is, partying with her friends and barely making time for me, yet she’s upset over a casual chat I had? I told her her behavior was unacceptable, and she apologized, but it felt forced. Later, when I asked her about her night out at the club, she got all defensive and irritated, accusing me of not trusting her! I swallowed my pride and called her the next day to apologize, telling her I missed her and just wanted her attention.
That evening, one of her friends came over again to hang out, and when I asked if we could talk, she said she *had to study* for her exam the next day. Are you kidding me? She’s always too busy for me, but somehow there’s always time for her friends. I feel completely ignored, like I don’t even matter anymore. Am I being too clingy or just stupid for wanting to feel loved? Why does she always make me feel like an afterthought?