Confession of Female Married Group A Officer

I’m 27 years old and married 6 months ago. My husband is 31 now. It was an arranged marriage, but we had a 6 months gap before the wedding, during which we both fell deeply in love, So it was a happy arranged marriage. After marriage, we remained very much in love. I follow his every word, and there is unconditional love from both sides, so it was a blessing for both of us.

He was interested in having a baby early without delay, as he is the only child in his family and continuing the generation is very important to them. I agreed to that, even though I wanted a 6-month gap. Now, I’m 5 months pregnant. After one month of marriage, I got selected for a Group A job in the government sector and was posted far away from his place, as he is also a government employee.

The distance is around 650 km. Still, we tried to connect every 15 days. Everything was fine, but in the past month, I’ve noticed quite a few changes in his behavior. He changed his WhatsApp profile picture, which previously had a photo of both of us. He had promised to keep it for a year. In the beginning, he used to call me from morning to night every two hours, but now he doesn’t call until late at night.

If I call him, he doesn’t pick up. We used to make video calls until 11 or 11:30PM, but now he refuses to talk for that long and cuts the call at exactly 10:15 PM, though he remains online. He has stopped being possessive about me. Earlier, he used to visit frequently, but now, even if he has three days off, he refuses to come. This week he came but got angry when I touched his phone, though he never reacted like that during the early days of our marriage.

He goes out for tea and returns after an hour, even though we have milk at home. I checked his phone but didn’t find anything. These changes are hurting me deeply, as I am extremely loyal to him and love him very much. One more thing-he didn’t accept my Instagram request initially. After 3 months of marriage, I found out he was texting other girls. On that day, I demanded he accept my friend request and put a profile photo of us together, which he did.

But I keep wondering why he was hesitant to accept my request and post a photo of us. Is our relationship only within four walls? Until then, I thought he was very innocent and hadn’t had any relationships before marriage-not even love-but his Instagram friend circle told a different story. He told me he never loved anyone before. For the past month, everything seems hidden and filled with lies, whereas earlier, he was so transparent.

I can’t digest these changes. I’m worried about losing my loving husband. I have doubts-why has he changed so much? Is he in a relationship with someone else? A series of questions keep coming to my mind. I discussed all of this with him, and he told me he’s not cheating on me and was just busy. Still, he hides his phone, keeps secrets, and tells lies.

He does care for me since I’m 5 months pregnant-he gives me money regularly and asks about my health and food-but his behavioral changes irritate me a lot. Now I’m confused. I don’t have clarity-whether he’s in a relationship or not, but he’s still hiding his phone and so many other things have changed. So how can I deal with it? I can sense he’s maintaining secrecy, texting others, and deleting messages, among other things.

Question: What should I do?

Option 1: Wait until I know everything clearly and then react

Option 2: Question him about everything

Option 3: Just let him be and live in my own world