My Husband Loves Me But Controls My Life

I’ve been married for a year now and have no contact with anyone in this world. Two years ago, I met this man. My mom knew about our relationship, was very supportive, and agreed to our marriage after five years, once I completed my postgraduate studies. But he said he could only wait for three years.

Gradually, my mom started disliking him, as she felt he was distancing me from everyone. But it’s not only my husband’s fault. My mom became greedy, expecting a lot from him-like wanting him to do grocery shopping. We used to travel long distances for medical purposes, and my mom never paid him a single penny for the expenses. He also spent a lot on us. Despite this, he was fine, but things kept getting worse.

Because of these reasons, he insisted that I limit my calls with my mom and other family members. One time, I came home for the holidays, and he always insisted I stay on call. I couldn’t spend time with my parents, and one day, my mom yelled at me for talking to him too much. He used to fight with me if I didn’t talk to him; he never understood. My mom said he was bound to help her with household tasks like grocery shopping and medical help since my dad is in the army and my mom can’t drive. She was yelling, and my dad overheard us.

He grabbed a woodcutter and was in a state to kill me. My sister held him back. After that, my husband told me to cut contact with my parents completely. I was blindly in love and thought he was right, so I did as he said. I was very disobedient to my parents. When my mom visited, I was told not to meet her, even though she traveled 800 km to see me.

Things got worse. One day, my parents suddenly visited me and were about to take me home forcefully. They took my phone. I decided to run away from them and managed to escape. Though I had no money, I called my husband, thinking I could return to my college. But he insisted I shouldn’t and told me to surrender at a police station and give a statement about the harassment my parents had done to me.

My parents and my husband’s family arrived at the police station. After a lot of conflicts and discussions, my dad refused to take me home, and my husband took me with him. He didn’t let me complete my studies, and eventually, we got married.

After marriage, I have a phone, but I only have my husband’s number saved in it. My husband loves me a lot and is very caring, but he doesn’t let me go out and is always around me. I have no individuality, but I’ve gotten used to it. When my parents visit, they don’t even let me see them, saying, “We did the wedding ceremony, they didn’t spend a single penny, and now they want to take our property.” But I know my parents aren’t like that.

They tell me to say hurtful things to my parents, like *”I’m not your daughter, go away, you are no one to me,”* etc. One day, I secretly called my parents, and they forgave me for everything. They said they would accept me in whatever condition I return and love me as always. They will let me continue my studies, as I was a good student.

But my husband loves me a lot, cares for me, puts in a lot of effort, and treats me like a baby. However, I feel he loves me because I always obey him, am very submissive, do all the housework, and cook great food. If I start fighting for my rights, things will be different.

I have attachment issues, and it will be very hard for me to forget him because he loves me, fulfills my every need, and takes care of me. But I also want to have a good relationship with my family and be in touch with them. I’m just 20, too immature for things like these. I’m always depressed, and I’m just tired of life.

Question: What should I do?

Option 1: Return to my parents

Option 2: Stay with him and compromise everything